He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
