just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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