how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize