Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
