You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
