I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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