It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Randomize
