How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
