so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
