Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
