I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
