I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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