He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
