She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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