? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize