I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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