He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
