Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I won't apologize to a one balled man
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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