u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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