And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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