I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
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