I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
