It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
