I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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