i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
and she was petting her beer can
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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