How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Randomize
