Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
