Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Randomize