ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
