I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
