How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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