You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Randomize
