Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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