RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize