You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
