I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
