But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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