I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
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