i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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