Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize