oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
