Got a toothbrush?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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