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Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
