i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
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