just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Randomize