I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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