Do vagina's smell?
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
