I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I did not marry a roomba.
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