the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
