I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
